As the RNC hate-fest slowly reaches it's 'crescendo' tonight with Mitten's acceptance speech, I can't help but feel just the tinsiest bit sorry for the old plastic, used-car-salesman lug-head and his party.They had very high hopes for their KKKonvention. They had all of their "No really, we're not ALL woman-hating, race-baiting, homophobes" banners pre-printed, they were all ginned-up to get their hate on against the evil black man in the Whitehouse, and the christaliban religious nutjobs were gleefully squirming in their tidy-whities at the party platform that allow them to officially hate 'teh gays' and force rape-victims to go to term with their rape-babies - because you know, that's what God planned all along...
But then mother nature, or more precisely hurricane Isaac, decided to rain all over their parade.
Literally.
So instead of the televised orgy of hatred, bigotry and intolerance towards President Obama that they had so desperately desired, we got coverage of New Orleans getting drowned again (way to go Army Corps of Engineers - see Harry Shearer's excellent documentary 'The Big Uneasy' for a better explanation), and President Obama acting all Presidential by declaring a state of emergency and offering Federal assistance to all states that needed it.
You know, just like President Bush didn't.
The KKKonvention finally got under way a day late, but there was trouble from the very beginning. The Paul-bots immediately refused to play ball, the RNC wouldn't even say their messiah's name out loud during the nomination process, and some delegates threw some peanuts at a black CNN camera-women saying "that's how we feed the animals"...In other words, the truly classless cluster-fuck the Democrats have been secretly praying for since Mittens bought himself the nomination.
Oh sure, we had Queen Ann grace us peasants with her presence in a $2000 dress as she read her speech (badly) from the tele-prompter, a sin only if you're Democrat apparently, exalting working women everywhere as the backbone of America, even though she has no idea what that actually entails. Then we had New Jersey's Governor Chris 'Humpty-Dumpty' Christie who managed to talk about himself for seventeen minutes before remembering that he was there to nominate someone called 'Romney', and not try and persuade us that his states unemployment rate of 9.7% (fourth highest in the country) is somehow better than the overall US unemployment rate of 8.3%. (Quick note to any republicans reading this, it is probably not a good idea to trot out as the personification of the economic policies you'd like to enact across the country, a Governor who presides over a state that is 47th in the country in GDP growth, 44th in personal income growth and lost 12,0000 jobs just last month....)
In a desperate attempt to pull the fat from the fryer they had Todd Akin's number one fan, Mike Huckabee, throw some red meat to the assembled comatose crowd as he 'aw shucked' his way through his attacks on womens' rights, the chairwoman of the DNC and of course, 'teh gay'. Then, Paul Ryan, the guy the Koch's picked for Rmoney as his running mate, made his debut speech wearing his big-boy pants for the first time ever, but instead of the hoped-for home run, he instead managed to thoroughly soil himself on national television with a speech so full of mis-representations and outright, bald-face lies that even Fox "news" (yes, that Fox "news") had to distance themselves from him.
So that brings us to today. The day that Rmoney finally gets to put on his prom dress and parade in front of an adoring crowd as they crown him with his nomination. The day that launches him officially on his quest to kick that lying, muslim, socialist, Kenyan, marxist in the teeth, and finally put the 'white' back in the Whitehouse. Only no-one really seems to give a shit about any of that. Instead of the pundits wondering what his speech will contain, what vast sweeping vision or policies he might outline, or whether he will manage to pull off the upset of the century and actually appear to be a real human being, they are all consumed with who the 'mystery speaker' will be that's on the schedule. Not the fact that this will be his first national speech, not the fact that he will be the official republican nominee, nope, the presstitutes are more interested in a 'mystery speaker' than the guy the gop has picked to go up against the President.
I don't know about you, but that's gotta suck, even for a soul-less automaton like Wall Street Willard, kinda like going to pick up your prom-date but instead of being ready to go when you get there, she's sitting on the couch with a bunch of her girlfriends watching Jersey Shore eating Cheeto's and scratching her butt...
So as this sorry-ass excuse for a National Convention winds down, like a sit-com that got renewed for one season too many, I sit here and can't help but feel a little bit of pity for them. I know what it's like to be disappointed, I'm a progressive liberal afterall, but for a party that prides itself on unanimity and strict 'message discipline' this election campaign has been an utter disaster from the primaries up through the KKKonvention.
But then I remember what they say they stand for, and who they really represent (hint - it ain't anyone making less than six figures, gay, of colour or female) and that tiny bit of pity disappears and instead becomes a great big grin. These miserable, bitter, angry, nasty, selfish, bigoted assholes have finally reaped what they've sown. And I kinda like that.
Fuck 'em all.
Cheers!!!
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