Why Glenn Beck is the stupidest fucktard on the planet..

Apparently today during the Glenn Beck radio show, Rep. Steven King of Iowa was on to share some of his knowledge and wisdom. This waste of air, accompanied by the mashed up bag of stupid that is the namesake of the show, bitterly complained that the Democrats plan on voting for the Health Care Bill that helps poor and sick people (ie non-persons to these rich white men) this coming Sunday.

Steve King said "They intend to vote on the Sabbath, during Lent, to take away the liberty that we have right from God." Not to be outdone in cloud-being worshipful-assholery, Beck bleated "Here is a group of people that have so perverted our faith and our hope and our charity...this is an affront to God".

Now then, after you pick yourself up off the floor from laughing at the two funny white clowns and all of their faux outrage, let's you and I go through and examine the number of mistakes, errors, and outright God-damned lies spewed by these genuises shall we?

1) The Sabbath is actually Saturday, not Sunday Mr. King you ignorant ass-half.

2) The "liberty that we have right from God" actually came from the (French financed) War of Independence and the subsequent emergence of this republic. So in reality, the liberty that this mentally-stunted idiot thinks the Democrats are"trying to take away" came from the French and not some mythical cloud-being. And that "liberty" you speak of so fondly Mr. King, is the same sort of "liberty" that you wish to take away from every woman in this country with your neanderthalic views on what level of control a woman can have over her own body. The only reason I smile when I think about this brain-dead, backward-ass, walking sack of dumb, is that his home state of Iowa just recently legalized gay marriage. The thought of a shit-scared Steven King cowering under his covers in Buttwipe Iowa late into the night wondering when "the gays" are gonna get him, makes me laugh out loud.

3) Beck's comment as a whole is the perfect example of why he, and all of the other frothy-mouthed hate-mongers on Pravda, sorry, Fukked Noizze Channel, have been so successful over the last decade. They make a blatantly false statement and then DARE you to call their bluff. Anyone that has actually read the Bible knows that what the Democrats are trying to do is almost exactly as that book suggests, you know, taking care of the old, the infirm, the poor and the children, in this case by getting them access to health care. But according to the rethuglican reptiles, getting poor people, and sick people, access to healthcare is actually the UN-Christian thing to do. In their screwed-up little worlds, Jesus apparently said "Verily I say unto thee, fuck the poor if they can't afford health care". Now, I don't recall seeing that specific passage in the Bible, but I may have missed it when I skipped over a few chapters here and there...

4) Number four is the coup de gras for me. Never mind their extremist views, never mind their own perverted views of Christ and his teachings (and don't forget Beck is actually a Mormon, which means he believes Christ came to America for a visit, and that you can have multiple wives and you must wear magic underpants - I am not making that up), the absolute best part of these inane comments is that they are all covered from head to toe in a slimy coat of rancid hypocrisy. You see, what neither one of these sanctimonious, just-how-frigging-surprised-are-they-going-to-be-on-judgement-day-if-the-bible-really-is-true, holier-than-thou bastards will admit to is this: In 2005 the republicans, including douche-nozzle King, on Palm Sunday no less, passed a bill allowing a Federal court to intervene in the Terri Schiavo case, further delaying her eventual peaceful death. I have no idea what sort of living hell Ms Schiavo may, or may not, have experienced during the 10 plus years her body was kept alive whilst all of the interfering God-botherers got to finally understand that when a court of law says "fuck off", in the end, it really does mean "FUCK OFF", but one would think that depriving her the liberty of dying peacefully, is actually measurably a whole lot worse than giving 35 million people access to healthcare for the first time in their lives. The fact that this self-righteous, corn-eating, shit-for-brains from Iowa and his radio-host fluffer cannot even see their own blind hypocrisy, let alone fess up to it, is yet another reason why republicans are a bunch of ignorant toads and deserve nothing more than the scorn of every reasonable, sane, and honest thinker on the planet.

A hearty 'Fuck You' to Senator Bunning of Kentucky...

...To those of you that don't know, the above-mentioned toothless cousin-fucker has decided to hold up approving the release of sufficient Federal funds needed to continue unemployment insurance for the millions of Americans still out of work courtesy of the shattered economy he helped create. When this crusty, angry, old white-man was criticised on the floor of the Senate by a Democratic Senator for his unconscionable stance his response was "Tough Shit". He has refused to answer reporters questions about why he is being such a colossal douchebag, other than on the floor of the Senate, where he states that the UI shouldn't be extended unless it can be paid for. In other words, this very same asshalf that had no problem whatsoever authorizing the plundering of the U.S. Treasury department with tax-gifts to the wealthy and spending a gazzillion dollars a month in Iraqnam, suddenly gets all 'fiscal-conservative' when it might benefit the lower classes. You know, the ones that used to mow this rich fucker's lawn, clean this rich fucker's houses, and used to do this rich fucker's laundry.

Not to be outdone Senator Kyl, the other crusty, angry, old white-man representing the state of Arizona (incredibly, Arizona has to suffer both Grandpa McLame and this Geritol-toker as their Senators) has come out and offered his opinion that unemployment insurance is actually a deterrent to those out of work to go and find a job. Yeah, that's right Senator Kyl, unemployment insurance payments are a wonderful substitute for a regular paycheck. They are so immensely huge that when I was out of work a decade ago I chose not to find another job for over a year because I was living so high on the hog...It wasn't the fact that there were no fucking jobs to be had, nope, according to this clueless imbecile, I chose not to work because the $600 I got every two weeks enabled me to get a finer grade of caviar to snack on, and a better brand of champagne to bathe in.

The fact that either one of these out-of-touch, miserly, gob-smackingly arrogant, angry, rich white-men is in any position of power is astounding. The fact that they each represent 50% of their respective state's voices in the Senate is an affront to the concept of representative democracy on a galactic scale.

But, as usual, I have a simple solution.

In the next election, let's help the voters in Kentucky and Arizona make this pair of modern-day Scrooge's unemployed themselves. And just for good measure, on the way out of their exclusive Senatorial club, strip them of their government (i.e. tax-payer funded) pensions and health insurance. Not because we're being vindictive, or mean in any way, but because we wouldn't want to discourage them from getting another job, now would we?