Back when I was a young lad (stop snickering) there was an album released by Genesis called "Selling England by the Pound." It was an album full of yearning to return to the days of yore, the days before there were newly-mega-rich Arab Oil Sheiks flooding the country with suitcases full of hundred pound notes and buying up all the old manor homes and castles they could find. I remember being genuinely panicked at the time that the Oil Sheiks would buy up the whole country and kick us all out (hey, I said I was a young lad at the time, gimme a break). Turns out all they wanted to buy was a few old houses, some department store chains, the odd football team, a shit-ton of Rolls Royces and a Prime Minister or two.
Nowadays in my homeland you don't have to worry about outsiders buying it all up, the crooks in Parliament Hall are giving it away. After displaying all of his supposed 'green credentials' in the run up to the last general election as a way to woo the unsure, and appease the sceptical, David Camerwrong has promptly discarded them all and is now pursuing a course of what appears to be total environmental pillage. His newest plan is to sell ALL of the national forests in the UK to private corporations, most of them timber companies. You know, the companies that chop trees down and turn them into breakfast tables or salad bowls. Oh, don't worry, planning permission will still be required before Sherwood Forest is chopped down and sent to the local B & Q (I'm not sure how much planning it takes to say 'See all those trees? Cut 'em down'), but in a not unsuprising twist of fate, those regulations too have been chopped down, in order to 'streamline' the process. Imagine that. Rather fortuitous timing, no?
Not satisfied with selling off the country's woodland heritage, Camerwrong has also given the green light to deep-water oil-drilling off the Shetlands, because the odds of another Deepwater Horizon BP-size fuck up is apparently so remote. Yeah right, that worked out well for the folks on the Southern U.S. coast now didn't it? What could possibly go wrong? Chevron has warned the PM that an oil spill out in the North Sea could mean releasing upwards of 77,000 barrels of oil a day, and be hellaciously more difficult to clean up than the Gulf oil spill, but that apparently doesn't seem to worry the green PM. It would appear that the only 'green' he is concerned with is the color of the money coming into the Government's coffers.
Time for a vote of no confidence perhaps? Yeah, pull the other one mate, Camerwrong would just send out Nick Clegg to do his version of Tony Blair's poodle-dance while the old Etonian just sat back and counted the cash.
Where's Robin Hood when you really need him?
Nice one Ben
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