The celebrity sections of the news media in the U.S. have been all abuzz this week after the hosting job done by British comedian Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes. Apparently our little Ricky cut a little too close to the truth and told some jokes that made more than a few of the precious darlings in attendance wince. Really? Tough shit I say. What did they expect when they hired him? Knock, knock jokes? Sycophantic arse-kissing? That's more up Jay Leno's alley. Look, I think that a great number of people like watching those awards ceremonies just in case someone actually does something unpredictable and memorable rather than thanking their lawyer or their pet-walker or their colon-cleanser.
Cary Grant once famously said of the Oscars "it's just a bunch of rich people sitting around applauding each other", and for the most part he's still right. Face it award shows can be very boring. No-one outside of that room actually gives a shit about any of the people that are usually so effusively feted, and no-one gives a shit about most of the categories either. Foreign film screenplay? Hello, no-one saw the bloody thing, who gives a shit who wrote it? We want best supporting actor and actress, best actor and actress and best film (trust me no-one gives a shit about 'best director' either, they can give some of the worst speeches ever, do you remember how awful James Cameron was after winning for Titanic? One word, Ugh). Anything other than that is boring bullshit that is simply there to fill in the time and make some of the "little people" feel special. (Best score? best make-up? Puh-leeze).
A much better idea is to trim the actual number of awards down as suggested above, and then have Ricky Gervais use the rest of the time for his stand up. Two things will happen. There will be a shitload more laughter, and a bunch of Americans will learn the proper use of several new words to impress their friends with.
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